Script sharing- Mayna's C2 Speech

Learn Through Men
(C2 speech-Organize Your Speech)

(delivering by Mayna on Jan. 04, 2005)

One day I was talking to my most beloved coworker- Pei-ling. I told her that I was having a classical music club. And she said she didn’t realize I had a passion for music. She thought I only had passion for men. Yeah, she was right to some extend. I love men. English men, French men, German men and Chinese men…..
In ALE, we always say “Learn Through Experience”. But for me, it’s more like-“Learn Through Men.” Now let me share some stories with you.

One day, I was on a date with an English man. Our meeting place was at the first floor of a hotel. Twenty minutes after our meeting time, I started to look all over for him. Just then, he walked down stairs and asked me: My God! What are you doing at the ground floor?” This English man-Bert who was very English. He once said: “French men are all dirty bastards. That’s why they invented perfume.” He was the most generous person I’ve ever met. He tipped every one who served him, including the fruit stall clerks, gas station attendants, Betel Nut Girls. He would buy a bottle of BaoLi Da B everyday - just to get a sexy smile from the scantily clad betel nut girls. He even forced to give me 10,000 on our second date. I didn’t want to take it cuz I thought he wanted to give me £10,000. It turned out I overestimate his generosity. It’s NT10,000 he talked about. You may wonder if I took the money or not. Yes, I did. You know what they say: “Something is better than nothing.”

I once had a gorgeous date who was from Ukrain, Russia. So when we went to a party everyone turned their heads to see this gorgeous man I had in my arms. All the ladies came and asked me where I picked up this man. Gee! He’s more beautiful than any Hollywood movie stars. Although they didn’t say it, I knew what they really meant was “Mayna, you are not good enough for him”. At the end of the party, he whispered to me and said two girls at the party gave him their phone numbers. He went on to say actually his record was getting 5 numbers one night. “Three from women and two from men.” So I’ve learned not to date a guy who is more beautiful than me.

Before ALE, I used to teach at a kid’s school. One day, my first grader, Johnny came to me and said: “Teacher, you beautiful!” I of course replied: “Thank you!” Actually, what I really meant was: “This monkey boy has got great taste.” Just then he showed an hourglass shape gesture. You know what they say: “Boys will always be boys.” Talking about horny boys. My former date-Martin surely took the cake. I remember quite clearly our first date. He was driving me to dine at a restaurant. He had his left hand on the wheel, and the right hand on my laps. And he said: Mayna, next time when we go on a date, would you please wear a mini skirt? That’d make my job easier. I replied: “Martin, I’m afraid you park your hand at the wrong place, cuz I don’t have the right legs for a mini skirt.” So after this date, I’ve learned not to date a horny guy who expects me to wear a mini skirt for him.

One more story for the road. Three years ago, I had a European boyfriend whose name was Tom. This guy was handsome, intelligent and sensitive, except … he was very bossy. At that time, I had just started out in ALE. He’d be upset if I had to work on the week day evenings and weekends, which I was required to. Once we had a fight, he asked me: “Which one is more important to you, me or ALE?” Without hesitation, I replied: “I’ll give you a hint: It’s not you.” So finally when he proposed to me I had to let him down cuz I can’t stand someone who’s bossier than I am.

Just last week, my friend Athena asked me: What’s your Mr. Right like? And I told her all the stories I told you just now. As long as he doesn’t spend money like his pocket is on fire i.e. Bert. Or as horny as Martin, gorgeous as the Russian guy or as bossy as Tom. Athena went on to say: Is that all you want? It shouldn’t be hard to find a guy for you cuz you’re sexy, smart and funny. Finally, I said: OK He also needs to be sexy, intelligent, sensitive, mature, independent, masculine and thoughtful. Then she said: Now I finally understand why you are still single. Maybe I should change the title of this speech to “ Why Can’t Mayna Get A Man.” Do you all agree? Yeah. I can’t agree more.